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Monday, February 19, 2007

Wedding Ring Zilla Grrl

I don't exactly know why but I wore my old wedding ring when I went out today. I just went out for coffee, a Tim Horton's pit stop to get away from cabin fever. But I picked it out of the jumble of things I have strung up hanging from my computer. It was on a string which had another ring my Mom and I found in a purse at GoodWill, also a rock (red jasper) which I bought at a Pagan shop in Newmarket. I had to cut the string to get the ring off. I don't remember tying so many knots in it but I did use a slippery, silky string - the kind that come undone easily. I wouldn't like to lose the ring and yet I didn't think I'd wear it again. Still here we are... both of us lonely... blab blah... I know there's a song like that.

So I wore the ring. Maybe I was feeling lonely. I know I'm not missing my ex and I don't want to get back together with him. I haven't lived a life where I want to go back and try much of anything again. Once is enough. If I can't make it work the first time I don't see the need to give it a second chance to blow up on me. I guess that doesn't include everything, but a lot of things.

Anyway, I wore the ring. I think I'm just missing being married, having someone to come home to, someone to listen to when things are too silent and someone to bug when I feel like bugging someone. It's not fair being alone all the time. I like it, some of the time. I couldn't stand being one of those attached twins though I guess if that was all you knew you wouldn't know anything else you only know what you've been living. Maybe that's why I like being alone sometimes cause I've been alone a lot.

This is becoming pretty wimpy and pittiful. I just thought it was interesting about the ring. It feels really clunky on my finger. Yet I liked having it there. I haven't taken it off yet, just for a moment or two to slide it around and take another look at that hunk of gold looking metal. My ring is a gold band with 4 itty bitty diamond chips across the front. They are so small they could be glass and I wouldn't know. I leave it and just assume they are diamonds cause that's what they are supposed to be.

What did you do with your ring, if you are divorced? Did you keep it, lose it or chuck it out somewhere? Maybe you had kids to give it to. I just have me. Maybe the ring was just bored tied up to my monitor for all these years. I would get bored if it had been me. Luckily I have legs to wander off.

Happy Tuesday, it's coming. Garbage day here. I think this time I will actually bestir myself early and get the bag out in lots of time. I can't really go out for breakfast but I could go out for coffee and just smell other people having breakfast out. That's almost as good. Graham says the insurance money should be here before the end of the month. I will treat myself to a breakfast out then or maybe Swiss Chalet for dinner. I love the smell of that chicken though I don't actually order it when I'm there. :D

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

When I got married I wore my ring to work for two days and got it caught in machinery both times.
So I pulled it off my bloody finger and threw it away in a fit of rage or something..

Have you ever thought of sharing an apartment with someone. They would be there to bug when you feel lonely..

Other Mac said...

Wow Happy and Blue Not Happy. .. Sell the ring. Not so easy ? Cause sweet day when you got it. Whetever get rid of it could get you a sweet blow up man doll. And take that string you held the ring on and chock that men doll. And give the guys abreak that want to get to know you.

I'm sure your right on 50 to 70 % maybe higher . But you might be letting that one guy slip through. Because of that above number ,

Some of us were really honest . I Had 4 on-line meets 3 went farther then friends but ended as friends . #4 will what can I say
we now live together And I don't
blow me up into the doll