It started snowing yesterday, it hasn't stopped yet. I have to go out for coffee cream and I don't want to. There are 20 feet (centimetres, at least) of snow piled up out there. What if I get lost trying to find my car? What if I freeze under a snow fort I build up while digging my car out from under all that snow? What if I can't get out of the driveway cause the snowplow has just come by and created a massive snow wave?
You may never see me again. Worse, I may not have coffee cream for that second cup of the day. Oh horrors!!! I wish I had one of those guide dogs or a dog team to pull my sled. Or, better yet, a honey-do. It is nice having a man around to play fetch.
If I win the lottery I will just buy a husband. Some guy to live in a shack on the backend of the property. He can open jars, put up the Christmas lights and any other electrical thing, he can squish bugs, shovel snow and rake leaves. He can go out in the snow and get coffee cream. I'll make the coffee, I'm willing to be nice, pet him and take him for walks. I'd be a very good husband owner.
6 comments:
I love being single but every once in awhile it would be nice to have someone to do the things you mentioned.
I do not love being single. I'd like to avoid being single if I could. Likely that's part of the problem. If they know you're out to get them they run in fear. ;)
You would have to pay a lot of money for a man who does all that. :) If I could get mine to do a quarter of that, I would be happy. :)
Oh thanks for visiting my blog.
That's why I thought I'd go to some country where they want to come to Canada. Bribery... ;)
I always thought a Russian guy would be good. Spirited, and yet used to following orders.
There must be mail order husbands.
I'd suggest trying to find a country where our dollar is actually worth something..
Eventually it always comes back to money. :) Maybe there's a husband-for-barter program/ service/ group somewhere.
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